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With everything changing over the past decade (and few weeks), maybe the future model for lesbian families will look different. I know a LOT now about where to find quality sperm.
There is something to be said--and Mundy said it well--about the wisdom gay women have to offer straight couples in terms of what works in a marriage.
That novel came out 20 years ago and revealed a history of how dykes lived before Stonewall. Our tongues discovered a silent language to express our needs. Later eras would continue to perpetuate the U-Haul as a wink-nudge measure of lesbian commitment.
The book contains what might be the first literary mention of U-Hauling, when Jess, the butch main character, meets Theresa, who will eventually wear her ring: After dinner I helped her wash the dishes and clean up. Early '90s comic Lea De Laria, who billed herself as "That Fucking Dyke," made it into an actual joke on The Arsenio Hall Show: "What does a lesbian bring on a second date?
Those were the gay women who had a profile public enough for my generation to actually see, sometimes even reflected in pop culture.
The femmes worked, too, and also kept the home and butch spirits up.
"This kind of openness may infect the straight world," she wrote, "and heterosexual couples may actually start to tackle the age-old problem of boring monogamous sex." She based her points on Liza Mundy's recent Atlantic cover story on why gay couples are in many ways happier than straight couples, as well as on recent data showing gay male couples are not the most monogamous people on the planet.
A rebuttal by Nathaniel Frank took the data from both sources to task: "None of these sources show that 'most gay couples aren't monogamous,'" he wrote.
The generation now in their twenties is even more attuned to this. At the same time, more lesbian couples than ever are raising kids together.
There are certainly inspiring, committed poly relationships in my circles. I've been to approximately 607 lesbian weddings over the past three years.